8 Habits for a Negativity Detox
“Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things.” Philippians 4:8….
Or not. The choice is yours and makes all the difference in the outcomes you will experience in life. I am blogging today about a topic that has swirled around in the human psyche since Adam and Eve took a bite of that darn apple. Why did they take that first bite? Because the desire for power was greater than their appreciation for the safety and pure beauty that surrounded them…Not-Enoughness.
The desire for power in life has opened the floodgates for negativity to pour into our culture faster than poop through a goose, as my Grandfather used to say. The power struggle has destroyed societies, marriages, companies, well intended non-profits, the media, reputations of our youth through bullying behaviors and at times taken lives.
The voice of Power over others says: “My reputation is not where I want it to be so I will destroy those around me to exalt myself AND I will hide in my virtual cave so no one will find me as I shame and blame others.” As Eckhart Tolle said: “Power over others is weakness disguised as strength.”
The quest for power was perfectly depicted in “The Lord of The Rings” by Tolkien’s creature Gollum. Sadly, Gollum lost his identity in the Ring along with his connection to love and safety. When the quest for power consumes one’s identity the result is a dark, lonely cave of negativity. The fuel behind this crazy quest stems from a deep seeded fear: “If I don’t get this, that or the other thing I am not O.K., I won’t be able to handle it, I won’t be successful, I can’t accept OR love myself and ultimately I might die (perhaps to my own wants, needs and desires).”
Negativity has become the new norm and along with it desensitization to what is good, right, true, beautiful, excellent and praiseworthy. Our moral compass has spun in the direction of shiny objects that continually feed the EGO (Edge God Out) with drama, confusion, self-centeredness, jealousy, envy, comparison, judgment, fear, doubt, worry, anxiety (stress is the number one cause of 97% of all doctor visits according to recent studies).
Sounds a lot like the ploy of the evil one to distract us from what is good, right, true, beautiful, excellent and praise worthy. Napoleon Hill’s book: Outwitting the Devil showcases conversations that Napoleon Hill has with the Devil in which the Devil reveals that one of the ways he traps people is by throwing them into confusion along with complacency (unconcerned). This is the space of non-action and neutrality which creates a petri dish for stagnant desensitization and allows for negativity to spread like gangrene.
What are you to do in the midst of increased desensitization, not-enoughness and a plethora of shiny objects that take over the moral compass and lull you into compromising the person you are created to be? Let’s face it, you can’t begin to create a ripple of positive SHIFT until you purify the waters within your own life.
Start with committing to specific behaviors that support your desire for more positivity. Integrate and take daily action on the following positive behaviors for at least 90 days to create and anchor new neurons in your brain resulting in a new positive messaging system that fuels positivity in your life.
Detox Negativity from Your Life with the Following 8 Habits :
- Upon rising in the morning pray: “Dear God, show me what my give back project is today.” The greatest sense of joy and purpose walks through the archway of love and service.
- Remove all negativity from your relationships: criticizing, judgments, shaming and blaming comments, negative and disconnected body language and intonation, ugly talk, stone walling and defensive behavior.
- Practice IMAGO Dialogue: Mirror, Validate and Empathize (Getting the Love You Want, H. Hendrix).
- Release the habit of watching and listening to the news. Surround yourself for these 90 days with uplifting messages. Replace the news with an inspirational audio book or uplifting music with positive lyrics. If you want to know about major events in the world take a quick look on line and limit it to 5 minutes or less. Along with the news step away from reality TV and programs based on abusive conflict, confusion, death and drama. Whatever you spend time focusing on spills out into your identity, beliefs and behavior.
- Narrow the time you spend on social media each day. Commit to putting out positive, encouraging information. Pray for the grace to release the insatiable need to be in “the know” along with longing to be seen, acknowledged and recognized for pithy comments.
- Unplug from all electronics at least one hour before sleeping and read material that is good, beautiful, inspiring, uplifting and positive.
- Bookend your days with prayer. Start your day before God and end your day reflecting upon the moments of goodness you created in the world at the end of the day: How did I add more love and kindness in my day today? How did other people bless me with love and kindness today? Be still before God, pause and breathe in the Holy Spirit. Ask for wisdom, blessing and guidance between activities in your day. Use transitions as mini-retreats to re-connect with your awareness of God’s presence, love and wisdom.
- When you flip back to old patterns of negative behavior, begin again as soon as you notice: Stop the behavior => Notice the negativity and how it makes you feel => Act on and Pivot your behavior in a positive direction: SNAP. You can implement EFT tapping to help calm the body’s reactive response. CLICK HERE an for a EFT demonstration.
Materials to Help Support Positive Thinking: